Top 10 albums of 2016

The real AOTY?

Another year of music is in the books, and frankly, I feel less enthusiastic than ever about the state of modern music. That's not to say that there wasn't some great new music released in 2016. I just find myself becoming less dedicated to weeding out the good from the bad with each passing year. It was all I could do to avoid putting the above album on my top 10 list this year. When a live album recorded 15 years ago and comprised exclusively of songs that were originally released 26 years ago threatens to crack your annual list of top 10 "new" albums, it's probably a sign you've lost your passion for discovering new music (even if said live album is by the greatest band in the history of recorded music).

Top 10 albums of 2015

Ween is back for 2016, fuckers!

Well shit. It's already February, huh? Seems like this annual top 10 list goes up later and later every year. At the rate I'm going, my top 10 albums of 2025 might not see the light of day until 2027. Honestly, I'm really just a music journalist in name only at this point. This is only the 12th post I've made on this blog since 2011, and four of those (including this one) are just my annual top 10 albums lists. Two of them didn't even have anything to do with music and one was just a rehash of all my old 3?aK posts, so yeah, suffice it to say that writing about music has kind of taken a backseat to damn near everything else in my life lately. That said, a bunch of labels still send me promos to check out, and Village Voice still sends me a Pazz + Jop ballot every year, so I feel obligated to at least post a top 10 list for all of you loyal Tempe Carnivore readers out there.

Like last year, I've included the points I awarded each album on my 2015 ballot. Each voter gets 100 points to distribute amongst their top 10, with no album receiving more than 30 points or less than five. Also like last year (and every single year I've published a top 10), this list is predominantly metal. Deal with it.

Top 10 albums of 2014

Spoiler alert: St. Vincent is not in my Top 10. Sorry hipsters. Maybe next year.

Well, here we are. Another year in the books and another Top 10 list of albums you've probably never heard of. There are only so many directions you can go in an introduction to one of these lists, and I feel like I've already exhausted them all, so I'll try to keep it brief. If you know me at all, then you know my list is usually dominated by heavy metal, and this list is no exception.

This year, I decided to included the points I allotted each album on my ballot for this year's Village Voice Pazz + Jop poll. Voters get 100 points to distribute amongst their top 10, with no album receiving more than 30 points or less than five. The Pazz + Jop poll is a stat geek's wet dream. You can peruse voters' individual ballots or sort albums, singles and voters by a wide array of criteria. Here are a few (debatably) interesting facts about my top 10 list:

Forty-one and living it

Happy birthday to me. Whoop-dee-fuckin'-do.

Sorry for the self-indulgent blog post, but the older I get, my birthday becomes less a celebration of all things me and more a time to reflect on where I've been and where I'm heading. I guess that's probably what grown-ups would refer to as "maturity," although according to the experts, I've still got a couple years to go before I have to start worrying about any of that nonsense.

Moodie Black - Nausea (Album Review)

Moodie Black - Nausea
Release date: May 6, 2014 (Fake Four Inc.)

When I interviewed Moodie Black MC/producer/mastermind Chris Martinez more than five years ago for a Phoenix New Times music feature, he had just started referring to his noisy, distorted and occasionally chaotic brand of hip-hop as "post-rap." He soon backed away from the label, however, opting for the less grandiose but more descriptive term "noise rap." 

"It sounded like I was a pretentious prick mostly," Martinez expained when I asked him recently why he stopped using the term. "But also because the music is what it is. I'll let the masses label it."

After listening to his latest batch of songs, I'm starting to think he was right all along. Nausea is Moodie Black's first full-length release for indie hip-hop label Fake Four Inc., and the follow-up to last year's self-titled EP that initially caught the label's attention. While Nausea is still plenty noisy, it also features the kind of epic, post-rock soundscapes favored by bands like Jesu, Explosions in the Sky and Deafheaven.

Post No. 100: On freedom and equality, and what happens when they clash

This started off as a Facebook status. I usually try to refrain from getting too political on Facebook, and after typing a few paragraphs, I realized I had a lot more to say on this subject than I originally thought. So I figured why not post it over here on my music blog? Makes perfect sense, right?

Anyway, the whole brouhaha over the recently-vetoed SB 1062 has sparked somewhat of an internal conflict between my rational, libertarian side and my compassionate, egalitarian side. I suppose you could sum up my general philosophy -- both in politics and everyday life -- as "live and let live," so these two sides of me are rarely in conflict. But this bill is unique in the uncomfortable questions it forces us to confront. Most everyone agrees that, at the very least, SB 1062 was an unnecessary law. It was a solution in search of a problem. Even the bill's most ardent supporters grudgingly admitted that there were no cases here in Arizona of business owners being sued (or otherwise chastised or harassed) for turning away business on religious grounds. 

The case most frequently cited in support of SB 1062 was that of a New Mexico photographer being sued for refusing to shoot the commitment ceremony of a gay couple. Now this is where the libertarian side of me starts to get perturbed. As disappointing as it is that homophobia is still very much alive and well in New Mexico, Arizona and every other state in this wacky-ass country, I'm also not too keen on someone getting sued for a having a "sincerely held" religious belief and sticking to it, despite how backwards and behind-the-times said belief might seem to most of the civilized world.

Top 10 albums of 2013

Well, here we are. We made it through the first full calendar year in the wake of Ween's untimely demise, and somehow, against all odds, the music industry managed to not only survive the year 1 A.W., but actually spew out 10 albums worth ranking in a listicle-type thingy. Putting together a year-end top 10 list almost seems quaint by today's standards. In its relatively brief existence, BuzzFeed has already ranked the relative worthiness of just about every item, person or event since the dawn of civilization, up to and including BuzzFeed lists themselves. (At least they have a sense of humor about their utter disregard for journalistic standards, I guess.)

So what's the point of adding yet another list to the shit heap? Well, this happens to be my list, containing my opinions. And my opinions are important. So much so that I usually present them as unassailable fact. Ween was the greatest musical act of all time. Slayer's Reign in Blood is the best 29 consecutive minutes in the history of recorded music. See? Those are most certainly opinions, shared by relatively few others, but I know them in my heart to be true.

It's no coincidence that the people who claim that all music has equal merit and individual taste in music is subjective tend to have the shittiest taste in music. Ultimately, that's why I became a music journalist. Some music is simply superior to other music, and the world needs me (and others like me) to sort it all out for them. Therefore, it is with great pride that I perform my civic duty and unveil my list of the 10 best albums of 2013. Consider this list your definitive, one-stop shop for the best music of 2013, and feel free to leave me a note of thanks in the comments below.

Joey Bada$$ and Samy Elbanna - two teenagers who will restore your faith in music

Lost Society's Samy Elbanna and Pro Era's Joey Bada$$

I was sitting at a poker table the other day when the conversation turned to music. The guy in the 7-seat was talking about a recent debate he'd had regarding the best 10-year stretch in music history. He was pretty convinced that it was 1965-1974, and nobody was putting up much of an argument. After all, it's hard to argue with an era that includes the prime output of the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, the Rolling Stones, Stevie Wonder, Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendrix, CCR and Janis Joplin, just to name a few.

After mulling it over for a bit, I acknowledged that his decade was damn near impossible to top, but that for me, it would probably be 1986-1995. It's a span that saw thrash metal -- and, for better or worse, hair metal -- reach its creative zenith. It also includes the rise and abrupt fall of grunge and the entire "golden era" of hip-hop. Maybe names like Nirvana, Metallica, Guns N' Roses, Slayer, the Pixies, Jane's Addiction, Smashing Pumpkins, Public Enemy, N.W.A and the Beastie Boys don't quite stack up to the names above, but they're pretty goddamn close.

Not coincidentally, that also happens to be the era when music mattered the most to me. In my teens and early 20s, discovering great new music was pretty much my number one priority, and at the time, there seemed to be an abundance of it. Unfortunately, by acknowledging as much, I'm basically outing myself as one of those annoying old people who always complain about how much better music was "back in the day." I never wanted to become that guy, but what can I say? Everyone gets old eventually, and full-time jobs, mortgage payments, credit card debt and student loans -- and, if I'm being completely honest, poker and video games -- tend to take priority over seeking out cool new bands.

That said, I do still try to make a concerted effort to find awesome new music as time and life allow (and even write about it on occasion). It's probably no surprise, then, that two of my favorite new artists sound like bookends of that glorious '86-'95 era. What is surprising is that neither of them is even old enough to buy a drink.

Top 10 albums of 2012

Well, I've run out of excuses for the absence of my "best albums of 2012" list. It's been 2013 for damn-near two weeks now, so I can't exactly say that I'm waiting for a last-second release to blow my mind. In truth, I've just been lazy in 2012: lazy about writing and lazy about seeking out new music. That's what happens when you're your own editor and you don't give yourself any deadlines or pay yourself jack shit. Suddenly, there are a lot of things more appealing than cranking out another blog post that might get read by 100 people (10 who came here willingly and 90 more who inadvertently stumbled their way here Googling cover art for metal bands).

So yeah, I admit it. I've been a lazy journalist this year, to the point that when I got an email from the Village Voice asking for my annual contribution to their Pazz & Jop poll, I worried that I'd even be able to come up with 10 albums worth ranking. Thanks to some 11th-hour cramming on iTunes and Spotify, that turned out not to be the case. After all was said and done, I still had to make some tough choices. Quality albums by the likes of Meshuggah, Brother Ali, The Sword, Fen, Testament, Goatwhore and Japandroids all narrowly missed the cut.

My list is pretty heavy on the heavy again this year. What can I say? I'm a metalhead, damnit. If you were expecting a paean to the brilliant artistry of Frank Ocean, you've stumbled onto the wrong blog. So for better or worse, here are my 10 favorite albums of 2012. If you love my picks or hate them, please leave a comment below. We journalists (professional or otherwise) thrive on internet comments, even those of the "ur writing is teh suck, plz die soon" variety.

Fruit Roll-Ups, rice crackers and whiskey: How I lost 50 pounds without exercise

Chubster author Martin Cizmar, before and after losing 100 lbs.

Sorry for the non-music post, but it looks as if Fat Kid vs. Fit Kid isn't much longer for this world, so I figured I'd compile all my dieting posts over here so they're all in one place. For those of you who don't know, I started a diet on April 2 of this year and, over the course of four months, lost about 50 pounds. I owe a great deal of my success to Martin Cizmar, my former editor at Phoenix New Times and the author of Chubster: A Hipster's Guide to Losing Weight While Staying Cool. While I'm not a hipster and I never really fancied myself as particularly "cool" to begin with, Cizmar's book and his own remarkable weight loss were an inspiration to me, and I'm happy to report that the Chubster plan flat-out works. I managed to lose all that weight without so much as a regular exercise routine.

If you're interested in discovering how you can lose a significant amount of weight via simple calorie counting, I strongly urge you to pick up a copy of Martin's book. To find out how I did it, read on. I've added an epilogue at the end, since I never really wrote a proper ending to this tale. Enjoy and happy counting!

Baroness - Yellow & Green (Album Review)

Baroness - Yellow & Green

Release date: July 17, 2012 (Relapse Records)

It's been a while since I've heard an album that I felt compelled to write about. In fact, I haven't posted a new album review since October of last year, when I boldly declared that Elder's Dead Roots Stirring was the best hard rock/metal album I'd heard in half a decade. Well, either my standards are rapidly diminishing, or we may be on the cusp of the next great era of heavy music, because as much as I loved Elder's album last year, I love the new Baroness double album, Yellow & Green, even more.

Funny thing is, I can still stand behind my Elder proclamation, because Yellow & Green is decidedly and unrepentantly not metal, and it only sporadically qualifies as hard rock. With the amount of buzz this album has already generated, I'm hardly the first person to make that distinction, but if it seems as if every critic and blogger is preoccupied with what this album isn't, it's probably because it's so hard to put into words what, precisely, it is.

Concert Review: Anthrax, Testament & Death Angel at the Marquee Theatre on 1/24/12

Anthrax's Scott Ian performing at last year's Big 4 Festival in Indio, Calif.

If you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you probably already know that I'm a huge mark for classic '80s thrash metal, so it will probably come as no surprise that, in this writer's opinion, last night's show at the Marquee Theatre was a resounding success. Anthrax, Testament and Death Angel -- three of thrash metal's longest-tenured acts, with more than 80 combined years of experience amongst them -- put on a helluva show in front of a capacity crowd that seemed to have no qualms with moshing the night away at a midweek show.

Three Questions as Kip (3?aK) - The Complete Series

Well, I guess I can scratch one New Year's resolution off my list. It might not be as significant an accomplishment as quitting smoking or losing 30 pounds, but I finally got around to doing something I've been meaning to do for quite some time now -- nearly as long as I've been writing this blog, actually.

What is this remarkable achievement, you ask?

I went back through all the "3?aK" posts and added links to tie them all together and make the entire series more navigable. This should make it quite a bit easier to revisit the infamous yearlong experiment I undertook during my tenure as music writer at College Times, in which I asked numerous musicians and celebrities to spontaneously get into character and answer three questions as 1980s hair metal icon Kip Winger.

Kreator - Pleasure to Kill & Flag of Hate: Part 10 in a 10-part series looking back at the best thrash metal albums of 1986

Throughout the year, I've been looking back at some of the best thrash metal albums of 1986 -- the year thrash hit its zenith in popularity and creativity. When possible, I've tried to interview band members, producers and others associated with the original albums. I've also tried to time the blog posts to coincide with the 25th anniversary of each album's release, although accurate release dates from 25 years ago can be hard to come by.

For the final installment in this series, I'll be looking back at a pair of releases by the seminal German thrash band Kreator. The band's sophomore full-length, Pleasure to Kill, was released in November 1986 and the three-song EP, Flag of Hate, followed in December. I was unable to nail down an interview with a band member, but I didn't want to post the last part of this series without an interview, so I reached out to author/publisher/radio host/metal expert Ian Christe, who was kind enough to agree to a Q&A about Kreator and the 1986 thrash explosion in general.

At the time of its release, Pleasure to Kill represented a monumental step forward for Kreator as a band and the German thrash scene as a whole. The band's 1985 debut, Endless Pain, was a comparatively forgettable effort and did little to foreshadow Kreator's eventual rise to the top of the German thrash scene. Pleasure to Kill immediately established Kreator as a force to be reckoned with. Songs like "Riot of Violence" and the title track created a template for Kreator's run of excellence over the next few years and remain staples in the band's live set to this day.

Top 10 albums of 2011

Well, it's that time of year again. Music critics around the world are revealing their Top 10 (or for the really ambitious, Top 25) albums of the past year, while angry, anonymous internet commenters are ripping them to shreds for being too mainstream, too obscure, too hipster, too hip-hop, too trendy, too nerdy, too old-school, too new-school or some other petty grievance. It never ceases to amaze me how so many people take it as a personal affront every time you pick 10 things and rank them, but hey, that's what we're here for. Some people make lists, and some people bitch about them. I'm happy to be in the former camp.

In my case, you could justifiably label my Top 10 as "too metal." It's no secret that I'm a metalhead first and foremost, but it's hardly the only style of music I listen to. Over the years, I've shown plenty of love to non-metal releases in my year-end Top 10 lists, but this year just seemed to be a really good year for metal (or maybe just a down year for hip-hop, indie rock, etc.). Outside of a pair of country albums, this list is all metal. Hell, even the two country acts on my list have metal albums to their credit.

But you know what? So be it. Maybe I'm just getting old and set in my ways, but these are the 10 albums that moved me the most this year. Throwing in a token nod to Fleet Foxes, White Denim or the Black Keys just didn't seem right in a year that featured so many great heavy releases. So feel free to leave a comment below lambasting my picks. I've developed some thivk skin over the past few years, and it just wouldn't feel like a proper Top 10 list without disgruntled commentary.

Sepultura - Morbid Visions: Part 9 in a 10-part series looking back at the best thrash metal albums of 1986

Throughout the year, I've been looking back at some of the best thrash metal albums of 1986 -- the year thrash hit its zenith in popularity and creativity. When possible, I've tried to interview band members, producers and others associated with the original albums. I've also tried to time the blog posts to coincide with the 25th anniversary of each album's release, although accurate release dates from 25 years ago can be hard to come by.

Sorry I'm a little late with this installment. I had hoped to land an interview with former Sepultura frontman Max Cavalera for this post, but with the end of the year fast approaching, I couldn't afford to wait any longer if I plan to finish this series this year.

Ironically, the significance of Morbid Visions lies not in the music contained within, but more in what it represents. The music itself is raw and unrefined, the lyrics are unsophisticated and the production is muddy. But the fact that it was spawned by a group of Brazilian teenagers who would ultimately go on to become one of the most innovative and influential metal bands of the late '80s and early '90s lends it credibility.

Hate Tim Tebow? Here are 10 sports figures more deserving of your contempt

Unless you've been living under a rock for the past several weeks, you probably already know that Tim Tebow has become one of the most divisive and controversial athletes since Muhammed Ali. Is it because Tebow is a draft dodger? A radical Muslim? An unrepentant trash-talker? Nope. It's just because he loves Jesus. A lot. Like, a whole lot.

I'll admit, until recently, I was one of those haters. And trust me, if you think this post is going to end with some miraculous conversion where I begin singing the kid's praises, you might as well stop reading now. He still bugs the hell out of me. I've just come to the realization that there are a lot of people in the world of sports who deserve my vitriol more than Tim Tebow.

But before I start naming names, let's examine why Tebow is so hated in the first place. Now some people might try to beat around the bush by saying they just think he's overrated, overexposed, a terrible thrower, etc. All valid criticisms, to be sure, but let's face it: the main reason Tebow's haters -- and they are legion -- harbor such rancor is because he's an outspoken, evangelical Christian. Okay, so that might be a bit of an understatement. He's probably the most outspoken, evangelical Christian athlete ever. 

Metal label exec launches cat rescue

Clover and Stevie at the Clover Cat Rescue in Patrick County, Virginia

I don't normally just copy & paste press releases. I know it's an easy way to provide content and generate traffic, but it just feels cheap to me. I'm going to make an exception for this though. I recently received a press release about an accountant at an indie metal label who recently opened a cat rescue in Virginia. It's a pretty touching story that combines two of my favorite things in life: heavy metal and cats.

Here's the press release, courtesy of Nuclear Blast Records:

Megadeth - Peace Sells... But Who's Buying?: Part 8 in a 10-part series looking back at the best thrash metal albums of 1986

Throughout the year, I've been looking back at some of the best thrash metal albums of 1986 -- the year thrash hit its zenith in popularity and creativity. When possible, I've tried to interview band members, producers and others associated with the original albums. I've also tried to time the blog posts to coincide with the 25th anniversary of each album's release, although accurate release dates from 25 years ago can be hard to come by.

This installment commemorates Megadeth's sophomore release, Peace Sells... But Who's Buying?. Depending on the source, the album came out in either July (according to Encyclopædia Metallum), October (Megadeth.com) or November (Wikipedia). Being the lazy bastard that I am, I decided to go with the latest of the three. 

Peace Sells was a landmark release for Megadeth and thrash metal in general. Along with Metallica's Master of Puppets and Slayer's Reign in Blood, it's part of an "unholy trinity" of seminal thrash albums released in 1986. While all of the albums I've covered in this series have devoted followings to one degree or another, there's little doubt that those three stand above the pack. I spoke with Megadeth bassist and founding member Dave "Junior" Ellefson back in July about the impact of Peace Sells and his memories of the early days of the thrash scene. Check out the interview after the break.

Dark Angel - Darkness Descends: Part 7 in a 10-part series looking back at the best thrash metal albums of 1986

Throughout the year, I've been looking back at some of the best thrash metal albums of 1986 -- the year thrash hit its zenith in popularity and creativity. When possible, I've tried to interview band members, producers and others associated with the original albums. I've also tried to time the blog posts to coincide with the 25th anniversary of each album's release, although accurate release dates from 25 years ago can be hard to come by.

Fortunately for me, Gene Hoglan has an outstanding memory. Not only did the former Dark Angel drummer remember the release date (Nov. 10, 1986) for the band's seminal album, Darkness Descends, but he even remembered the exact date they entered the studio to record it.

Hoglan joined Dark Angel in 1984 and his impact on the band was immediate -- not only as a drummer, but as a songwriter and lyricist as well. Darkness Descends has long been considered the band's masterpiece for its ridiculously fast tempos and sheer brutality. Hoglan remained in Dark Angel until the band's demise in 1992. Since then, he has attained legendary status among metal drummers, playing with such bands as Death, Testament, Fear Factory, Strapping Young Lad and Dethklok. I recently spoke with Hoglan about the 25th anniversary of Darkness Descends, his memories of thrash metal's early days, Dark Angel's reputation as one of the fastest bands alive and his new instructional DVD, The Atomic Clock.